Hashtag life

I honestly don't know where and how to start this post. Really. So many things I would love to share but just don't know which to start from. But yeah... I shall start with something most recent. This blog is an impromptu one. Typing what and how I feel now so that in future, there is something I can look back to.

Well.. I guess I've been living a life where I try to please people. Giving in to what they say/feel despite being against it just to save the relationship between two person. Sometimes, idk what I'm doing. Why I have to do all these and what for? Does it benefit me? Not at all. But one thing that I've come to realise is that the world does not only revolves around me. I can't just think about how I feel and neglect others. My point of view and others aren't the same. I can be selfish and only be bias to my point of view. But sometimes, I can't help it but feel that way. That my point of view is not respected. Ok, I admit that I don't always respect people's point of view and strongly go with my point of view. But at some point... I guess I have my limits. I'm not as strong as anyone thinks that I am.

Bringing me to the next point:

Some humans are like crabs

Why I say this? Because I don't think that anyone is fully strong minded in this world. Everyone has their weak point of which would destroy him/her. Just like crabs. They appear strong and fiery on the outside, protect themselves with their pincers, but once you break them, they are actually very soft on the inside. This applies to us as well. Not everyone who seems to put up with all your nonsense and stuffs are actually ok. They just don't wish to tell you. Don't want unnecessary conflicts. Cause they know that the other person will never understand. OR maybe my statement is wrong? Maybe sometimes the other person will understand. But this person who is putting up with too many things don't feel it. Seen too much that just scares he/she off. Too paranoid. What can this person do, honestly? Afraid of things that would be revealed and cause trouble so just hide it away. But I know... No matter how deep the secret is, how much it is well hidden, it can't be kept away forever. One day,I believe things will be revealed and by then, I hope I know what I am suppose to do.

Blindly fitting in

Idk has anyone ever been in the same situation. But it's complicated. In order to keep one person by your side, you have to sacrifice so many things. One common thing is sharing the person you dislike. Yeah.. I admit that I have a whole list of people whom I dislike. Some of them it's hard to forgive, some, hard to face and some I want to forgive and maybe already did but have yet to forget. I find it a pity, to how in life you can't live to please everyone. You just can't have nice thoughts towards everyone. A certain someone will have a negative thought from you. Worse, you just can't help it. For me, as to what my father has told me, is that we all are being punished by God. Around the world, we speak different languages, every language has its own meaning of a certain word and because of the language barrier, we tend to misunderstand each other and cause conflict. Making us feel miserable and hurt for what we've done wrong and serve it as our punishment. But for me to say, even speaking the same language can cause misunderstand, don't have to talk about other languages.

But don't forget the bright side of this "punishment" we serve here. We get into conflict, we misunderstand each other, we quarrel, all these are for us to learn. I realise over the years of how the same problem occurs over and over again. From my point of view, why do things always happen over and over again? It's because you haven't learn the true lesson behind it. Until the day where you have fully understood what went wrong and what you shouldn't and should have done, then will that problem disappear. I mean come on, imagine your life with no problems, carefree and stuffs.. Good is good, but would it be better than over coming a problem and you know you've learnt something beneficial from it? Just like the feeling difference between plainly copying school work and working hard for it. Which one would satisfy you more? Having no knowledge on anything and doing well or having knowledge in a certain thing and doing well? Up to you to say what it is.

I guess that's it for now. All that I have to say have been said. I just went through a minor problem a couple of minutes ago, and right before I actually wanted to tear and my heart starts aching, I put a stop to it. (SELF REMINDER! READ THIS OVER AND OVER AGAIN WHEN YOU FEEL DOWN JIAEN!! ) Because why let something you know that in the end, everything will eventually be ok to affect you? You know exactly it's going to be ok so don't dwell over it too much. If you want to cry, cry. But don't let it affect you. I know you're stronger than you think you are. No one has the rights to affect you. Problems aren't gonna stay. Don't care about others too much. Give yourself some love an respect cause if you don't  respect your own feelings, who will?! You have a family who loves you, you have a roof to live under, you have almost EVERYTHING, what is the problem which is bigger than not having all these? things are going to be ok. Alright? God is with you. He loves you. Don't cry.

Changes (Part 2)

Oh so hi there! This is a continue blogpost from my back then blogpost regarding changes around me. Changes... Well I guess not much (?) as it has only been like a year. So yeah... Here we go. 

FASHION

I guess now I'm not not really into skirts anymore. From previous post, it shows that I was more of a skirt person, but now, I'm more of a SKORTS person. Yes skorts. So much that my haul from Bangkok has a lotttttt of skorts. Also, I'm more into I guess... Dark coloured clothings more? No longer the pastel pastel flowery kind of design.  Okok, shall let pictures do the talking.

    Ok, maybe.. Sort of like Rompers too! But with skorts as the bottom. 

    

    One with shorts ; I know I'm very blue

    

    One set outfit; I swear I was so insecure with those stretchable skirts around my waist that squeezes my fats and I was scared they expose. LOL 

   

    

    If you've visited or seen from Instagram, a romper outfit to a wedding dinner! Yup, those heels from previous post! 

    

    For this, I have no choice but to pair it with stockings cause it was too short :x

    

    This is so far the most colourful shirt I've worn. HAHA. I had to throw away the skorts in Bangkok because the idk what's that called was coming out and it was so uglyyy.

  

     

    Basically my airport fashion. 

    

    I love love love x100 this top that I got from Bangkok. So much I bought 2 colours :x and yeah.. Skorts !! 

    

    Yup, skorts from before. Paired with a blazer which I eventually took off because it was too hot. 

    

    And.. My last day ootd. Sad to leave Bangkok. And I'm still missing it now.

    

    Both top and bottom from Bangkok. And yeah.. SKORTS. 

     

    OH OH! I'm pretty into accessories nowadays too! Especially those necklaces and fancy arm candies. I do not have much pictures taken of them, but I guess here's some.

    

    

    

    

    LOOKS

 

well... Pretty much the fashion post has shown how much I have changed over the years. I'll just show two pictures. One from January and the recent one.

    

    I had short fringe back then, non rebonded hair.

    

     Now is long fringe; rebonded hair. I guess that's the only diff.

     PERSONALITY/ATTITUDE/BEHAVIOUR

I think throughout this year, i've learnt a lot? I've also come to realise how I'm more sensitive towards certain things. I can't deny that some of my decisions and reactions are still very childish and selfish. I've also let go off certain things that I thought I could change. Accepting someone/something for who she/he is. I think this is it for now. Talk about this year more in later posts.

    

    

    

    

Mixed feelings.

So much in my minds that I got to say... 

1. School (EXAMS) 

I swear I'm stressed up now. Like seriously. 1 day away from my Amath+History paper. 2 days from my Emath paper. So much things yet to little time. Up till now, as I'm doing my TYS (Ten Year Series), I still find myself having difficulty doing the questions. (DAMN!) it's like... Even the basics?! WHAT?! And I'm sitting for the paper in like less than 48 hours time?! What's this man T.T I feel so blur and annoyed at the same time... Honestly, I don't find the good in scoring top or the best in a certain subject or in position... It clearly showed me how more competitive I became. Fear of losing to others, fear of losing the position, fear of not hitting the target, fear of almost EVERYTHING. Not a nice feeling afterall... 

-What Am I doing: stressed, worrying. 

-What I should be doing: I guess as I think of it.. Praying would be the thing I would do as of now. Also, getting rid of that stupid thinking above and just do my best. Right? Haisz. 

2. School (FRIENDS) 

There are pros and cons being in a different batch from those my age. I'm studying with the 1999 batch of students. (I'm a 98-er) 

Pros: 

Having to be able to cope with everything better. (If not I would be sitting for O's in a few days time) 

Cons: 

Having to be stuck with people who's mentality is a lot more immature. -.- 

Idk is it that my thinking mature too fast or is it that my classmates are just too childish. Like seriously. I personally don't like the fact where people use my work to "reference" and then copy everything over. Like seriously?! Don't have brains to think? Don't u feel guilty to score using other's work? That's like copy right please! -.- Even in tests and exams... Where communication is so often... Cheating makes u look like a loser. Totally LOSER. Shows how dumb u are. Not impressed. 

Not only in school work. Also in the class. Among one another. Ok, so there was this incident where one of the class's girl who is isolated by the rest. She is like the target for all those immature guys who act like monkeys. Target as in ... Negatively. We were asked to surrender our phones and this girl was just slow. So this guy, I shall name him A, snatched it from her. She slightly hit him for it, and then he used the textbook to whack her and she fell. So she cried. And guess what was the class's reaction? REINACT THE INCIDENT. WTF?! People is already feeling down, and yet they still have the cheek to laugh. What's wrong with people nowadays -_-' 

Another problem:

So I used to be close to a group of girls in the school. We were literally like best out of the best of friends during that period of time. I even had the thinking that we were going to be a life-time friendship. But mehhh. Things changed. ok, everything changes. But this time. It's without a freaking REASON. It's like u put in so much effort to show someone u care, and yet they just leave u and not bother about how u feel. Even better when that someone doesn't admit his/her fault. I really don't understand.. Is that important to have friends who could benefit you? Totally don't get what human beings are thinking... Mostly only want to see u suffer and losing to them, then they will be happy. (OK CAN) but really, know your limits. We all have feelings too! Spread at least spread real facts lahhh. 

Third: 

I have "friends" around me. So many. I don't even know who's face is real and who's is fake. It's true people... They are nice friends with you and stuffs.. But when it comes to results, academic, THEY ARE SELFISH. They only want the best for themselves. Neglecting how well or how bad u do. They become COMPETETIVE. It's horrible guys... Why can't everyone just be normal? Just work hard for a certain score and not just merely trying to beat over someone? Just trying ur best and stuffs... Why is it not as easy as it can be said? Sighs. 

Fourth: leadership 

I hope u guys are reading this. So recently I was posted to a position in the prefectorial board executive committee. After being the senior of the board for around 2 months, I found out many things that I've never knew. I learnt a lot too. Weird but yeah. Firstly, it would be that I got to understand how my juniors feel more. So I was asked to select a few leaders for the school's publicity video. And so I sort of picked out those who rarely get a chance? (To be picked) and one of the response I got was that they finally got the chance to be doing something for prefects. For this point, I feel that I actually failed. I did not give equal amount of chances to everyone. Some to them, it's like the existence in the board doesn't exist. Coming to conclusion of those we feel are the potential leaders, but yet we forgot that the chances of giving those few potential leaders is too much. Too much which allowed them to show and become a better leader. I've now seen potential leaders who are still hidden. I want to give them a chance to shine. 

(LOL AT THE LENGTH BETWEEN PROS AND CONS) 

3. FEELINGS 

Everyone of us have feelings towards someone. It can be an infatuation, an eye candy or maybe a crush? Idk whether or not I should be posting about this... But yeah.. Since I started, might as well continue. I've been confused about my own feelings. U know how u're trying to forget someone and it's so hard? It's like u know it's impossible but yet you keep trying? Not realizing that it doesn't brings any good to you but just hurtful feelings? Honestly guys, I can't stop my own feelings. If I could, I would do so long long long long time ago. Till the extend I have to trick myself in believing that I like someone else (successful for that few hours and then back to reality). These like and don't like feeling is not nice at all. Like if only these feelings could stop for a while. (It's making me overthink and think too much!) All I ever wanted was a conversation... Is it that hard? Ok. I should stop here. Not wanting to continue anymore. Knowing there are people who is reading my blog. NAHUH. 

Shall end off my blog post here.. I'm tired.. Gotta go continue with my work. Enough ranting and spilled all my words. 

Xoxo 

Realizing

Hey all! So yeah.. I've been a while and left this blog unattended to. Sorry about that if anyone of you happen to be waiting for my next post (I guess none HAHA) 

So.. Today, right now, I have so many things that I want to say. But I'll pin down to the most important thing I've learnt in this week. 

You know how us girls are so so so x100000 concern about how we look, how people see us and stuffs. Just all that concerns our looks and appearance to others. Well, for me, I am that sort of girl who worries about everything about my appearance. I get paranoid with all the stares that the public gives me. Sometimes when I'm positive, I would be like "oh, too gorgeous for you?" In my minds ofcourse... Or even "too pretty that's why the stares?" But on days when I'm in a relatively bad and sad mood, I would be like "OMG... What's with those stares?" "Am I appearing ugly? Fat? Short? Big legs? My tummy showing?" All these thoughts... Are so ridiculous and not necessary. Nah uh! 

Ok so, what does that have to do with why am I blogging about this. Well, recently, I changed my spectacles. To a larger frame ofcourse. For some reason, I find myself looking ok when selecting. I find it suitable and all. BUT! My minds only changed after I attended school the next day. Not wrong... All the judgemental comments started to come in. "Eh look at JiaEn" "YOU LOOK VERY WEIRD" X5 "y ur specs make your eyes look so small ah?" "The specs too big for you" "You look funny" FOR THE WHOLE ENTIRE DAY I'VE BEEN HEARING ALL THESE COMMENTS GOING IN AND OUT. Even the stares... 

Despite all those comments and stares.. I  came to realise one thing along the way. For some reason, i hear a voice inside my head telling me "it doesn't matter how others see you, what matters most is how you see about yourself" Yes, I was shock myself too.. To have that positive thinking inside my head that I never thought would and never imagine myself looking to the positive side. To be honest, I've never really seen myself pretty or anything.. I'm always paranoid with how I look. I have fat thighs and weighing as heavy as 55kg. Sometimes I would look into the mirror and wonder why am I born with my eyes so small... Why is my nose so flat.. Why is my face so big, why am I not naturally skinny like every other girls, why do they look good even without trying...All these thoughts just haunts me.. I have to TRY HARD to be good looking. 

Above all these, the take away message I've come to learn and realise is that I am the master of my mind, if I think I am good enough, nothing else matters. No one else is able to defeat my thinking. No one else should be able to. The most important judgment that wins at the end, is still my own thinking. If I feel that I look good, ofcourse I will see myself looking good. If I find myself fat and ugly, ofcourse I will appear to be. If one leaves u because of how you look, then just don't give a damn about that "friend", if one judge you and laughs at you, just smile at them and forget it. And if you're like me, trying to look good and all, DO STH ABOUT IT. (This is sth I have to remind myself too btw cause I'm those who slacks off halfway. Oops.) but really, If we don't do anything about it, we're just gonna remain like this. Funny? NO. 

I'm still trying. I'm glad I'm able to achieve this thinking of how my own judgement of myself is the most important above all the rest. 

Before I end off, I have a verse that I would like to share. Just came across it from the bible that my cell leader has just sent to the group: "The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing" -Psalms 23. 

another reminder, GOD LOVES YOU. He created you, so you, SHOULD love yourself as well. 

Xoxo 

Negative // Positive // Being the difference

No doubt...I'm back feeling rather down again. Though not wanting to feel this way but why? Out of sudden I'm just tearing everytime and strangely, without a reason.

NEGATIVE
My life is so difficult

POSITIVE
What about those kids who is dying to live? those soldiers who is dying to survive.

MY THOUGHTS
Honestly, we cant compare to them.. How we are going to live has already been decided before we were born. They have their happiness, their difficulties, so do we. In this world, there are 3 types of livings. The rich, the moderate, the poor. The poor envies the rich, but not knowing that the rich has their problems too. Only knowing work work work and forgetting about family time. The poor then would have plenty of their time to be with their families but then the problems they will face is financial difficulties. The moderate would be stuck between both.. sometimes have this, sometimes doesn't. A problem for them too. But at the end of the day, we are all human beings. What matters most is our.. heart. Must not be too greedy and selfish. Cause no one will know when a miracle will happen. Just gotta be prepared for what's gonna happen.

NEGATIVE
No one ever cares about me

POSITIVE
who says so? your family does.

MY THOUGHTS
It's true that " no one cares " is just a sentence that is full of rubbish. There are people who cares, just that we are not receiving the care from the person we hope would be showing care to us. I'm annoyed by how people will tweet about "NO ONE EVER CARES ABOUT ME" or "NO ONE UNDERSTANDS ME" when they themselves aren't letting giving us a chance to. As much as we try to, they don't allow and expects us to understand them. -.- does it gives any logic to that? But at times, u know ur family is there for you, but then.. nowadays.. it's always " peer influence " that are making friends affecting you more than anything in the world. suck it up then. Some friends are just temporary and as scary as it may seems, it's the fact that some of those "friends" that comes into your life are actually wanting and waiting to see you breakdown and suffer. For me now, I only can rely on myself and God who I know is with me. As much as i know he's there, at times i fail to do so. sorry. :(

NEGATIVE
I'm not good enough

POSITIVE
There are things you can do and others can't.

MY THOUGHTS
I'm not afraid being on stage. Ok, i do get frighten at times when I have to speak to a crowd.. But at least i have the guts to accept the challenge and do it cause I like to do so. I must admit, I'm bad at public speaking. But one thing for sure, I like to do so. I can speak up, just that I will get nervous and sometimes forget my line (soooo embarassing... I forgot my lines that day when i was emceeing for schoool's SMC alumni dinner) or stumble over my words (like how i always do when i do my duty on stage every morning) or even speak like a bullet train (occurs during morning announcement too). How? I'm still trying to be better at it.. i really hope one day I'll be able to speak better and get use to speaking infront off the crowd. so, if anyone of you think you're not good enough, look into the mirror, find something about u that is u're special in or daring enough to do that others can't and improve slowly from there until u succeed ! HWAITING!

NEGATIVE
I'm afraid my dream is too big for me to reach

POSITIVE
Since you've dream, surely there'll be a day where u will get there

MY THOUGHTS
If you all see this.. u'll most likely laugh at my dream is so impossible. I dream to be a star. An artist in Acting/singing/dancing like those kpop stars. Bet you're laughing at how foolish I am to dream at such things.. Want to know my reason to it? Firstly, it's my passion. I like to do be able to do things i have passion for. Just like hoping for a miracle to come by.. It just makes me happy being able to do what i like. and being happy just makes life a lot better. You know how a star could be sooooo busy over schedules that all they think of at the end of the day is sleep. Won't even have time to think of what's going on in life. That's the model life i dream of having. You will be too occupied to think of other things. Will I ever get to my dream one day? I'm not sure what's the first step to it still..

Haisz.. Now I've just got so many areas that I'm so stressed out about.

ACADEMIC
As Much as i'm doing fairly well, I still feel that I'm still not good enough.. My languages are a burden T.T c6 for both languages... I dont know... I'm wanting to do well, but i don't seem to have a goal to work towards.. Like not knowing where these results are going to bring me to. I don't have a school that I'm aiming for or a future.. all day i will just know how to dream my that impossible dream..that's my one and only dream i guess? ok, I did choose F&N as one of my subjects i want to take, cause i love cooking and baking.. but I don't have intentions to be a chef or anything... Also my maths.. It's getting harder.. and I'm gonna have troubles sooner or later if i'm not gonna practice on it. But it's just so hard for me to keep focus and study.. everyday I'll only look forward to shopping, watching dramas and then cry a bunch because i put myself into the character's shoes ._. ( weird i know )

CCA
As much as I love dancing, i don't know why i just don't look forward to chinese dance.. It's like a burden to me everytime i think of it.. But thinking of how i worked and trained myself for dance, makes me continue being in this cca and not giving up. since i've trained myself so that I can be better at the dance techniques, why waste it by quitting? Idk.. I just kept looking forward to stepping down next year.. just makes me feel very sian (boring).. I just dk why also that i kept looking forward to end of class... maybe i just couldn't be who i am in dance.. Having to hide all emotions and just focus on dancing.. Just makes me uncomfortable somehow.. I get tired in the last 1-2 hours of dance.. when my arms and legs are getting wobbly and weak.. Just hoping this would at least bring me somewhere one day.. make my effort worth it.

FRIENDSHIP 
Idk as well.. ok, everything mostly idk cause i'm always unclear... recently, things sort of happened between me and a friend i treasure a lot.. haisz.. Even trying to be normal and cheerful like last time, we don't seem to get along well anymore.. it's like.. i was lost for a moment.. My tweets even make people think i'm depressed over a relationship or sth.. cause honestly, friendship and relationship are THAT close.. just that tiny bit is different. i just dk why.. WHY DO I ALWAYS CARE SO MUCH?!! WHY DO I ALWAYS TRY TO KEEP PEOPLE BESIDE ME?! WHY DO I KEEP TRYING TO MAKE MY FRIEND HAPPY EVEN IF IT TO SAY THAT I WON'T BE?! WHY DO I ALWAYS TRY SO HARD?!! WHY DO I ALWAYS GIVE IN TO SAFE THAT FRIENDSHIP?! WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ONE THAT IS WRONG?! WHY CAN'T I PLEASE MY FRIEND?! WHY CAN'T I MAINTAIN A FRIENDSHIP WELL?! IT'S TIRING!!! DOES ANYONE EVEN KNOW IT?! NO! ..... IT'S ANNOYING.. HAVE TO SUCK UP EVERY ATTITUDE  OR TANTRUM OTHERS THROW AT ME.. AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS TO THEM FROM ME, THEY WILL GET UNHAPPY -.- WHAT IS THIS MAN.. I'm not even able to control my own life.. always being controlled by others...

BEING THE DIFFERENCE
I'm kinda annoyed by how everyone is becoming a follower to how the society is.. sometimes you just gotta be the difference and shine out of the crowd. Don't be afraid that your fashion style is different from your friends, because it makes you who you are. Don't be afraid to not have the device that everyone is having. Because it makes you the difference and it might even safe your life. why? cause without the distraction, you will be more aware of your surrounding. Just like how my Dad hates it when he sees me using my phone outside. once, i was looking at my phone and when i saw a few people crossing the road, followed, i did not realise a car coming. My friend pulled me back and i realise the traffic was still green light. Crystal, if you're reading this. Thank you! Conclusion? Everyone is trying so hard to fit in and wondering why they can't shine. If you're spending the rest of your life just being a follower, just following what others do, it's nothing new. So why not step out of your comfort zone, be who you are and make the difference? How about start being a companion to those who has been forgotten? Rather than just walking pass them like how others do... I became the difference among my friends when i'm out with them. I dress differently. I became the difference in front of dancers, who spoke up for myself that the majority will never to. Sometimes, becoming the difference isn't that bad afterall. though the period of time might be hard, but it's definitely worth it!  But there is 2 type of people. The successful ones and the non-successful ones. The successful ones to me are the one who falls down, yet still believing in themselves that " I can still do it after standing up " and they don't let " giving up " take over them no matter how many reasons to why they should be giving up. The non-successful one are those that let " Giving Up " take over them. once they fall, they can't stand up anymore, even if they do, they do not move forward but move backwards and wonder why life has never shown them an sign of success. So will you be the one who will follow? or the one that becomes the difference and become successful?

Ending this post with a quote, "Being yourself isn't a crime, but it makes you special instead" 
In life, just like me, many ups and down occurs, but what to do? you have the rights to make the decision. history does not repeats itself. It's the same problem, just wanting to see how you face it and how you're going to deal  with it. will you deal with it differently? or will u still be the same and not learn from the past? all the best! 

15th Book closed

 Happy New Year everyone! It's been.. A year and 2013 just flew past like that. Fast or fast? HAHA!! This time I'm gonna talk about 2013. 

2013

  2013 has been a challenging year yet blessed year for me. It was hard in the beginning of the year. Actually I somehow forgotten what happened.. All I remembered was in January, it was my first experience of orientating a secondary 1 class for orientation. I remember how I was so shy and dare not speak up or even say a word in the class. But slowly as I got comfortable and with the help of seniors, I slowly managed to.

Guess nth much happened in January anymore? Just maybe daily life and not much to update on. 

    1E1'13 was the class I oriented ! 

February was a tiring month. Actually for several months it has been tiring. I was practising for chingay  under the Peach Blossom category. Practises were tiring but it was a great experience to be performing there! I sure had fun performing! 

 

   People I met. Not all, but most of them! 

 

 In march it was the time where I had to say goodbye to my dear friend, Lynette! 

I can't deny that I cried so badly that day.. I didn't know till so last minute! Remember how we used to fight and quarrel over nonsensical stuffs.. Stupid somehow.. :x  Hope to see ya soon Lynette! God will always protect and love you no matter what! :* 

 Pretty much nth major really happened or memorable in April I guess? So yeah.. Skip~ 

 In may I tried out ballet lessons. But for the trial lesson, idk whether is it I'm used to Chinese dance or what that I kept on becoming more of a Chinese dancer in class. To me, I don't suit ballet. So yeah.. It was a great experience. I'm still trying to find which dance will I be able to enjoy and commit myself to. Also in May that I reunited with my clique that I once left due to some problems between us. While I was away, I met other friends who i got to know better and finding out who's worth keeping and who's not. Also my Mid Year Exams which I did not do as well.. Compared to my MYE and EOY in 2012. 

   My Mid Year in 2012 

   

    End of year in 2012 (a slight drop) 

    

   And a huge and tremendous drop in MYE 2013! 

June was a rather wasting of my time month except for camp TLFO! Awesome camp staying at chalet and completing the missions and raising of funds!

    Team yuying! 

    

. PSI was one of the reason too that I didn't get to go out that often. Idw to mention why for some matters (personal). Just a lesson learnt =) 

July was back to sch day after that month of June holidays! I was rather excited because that next semester would be taking HomeEcons which is a subject I am interested in! So yeah.. July goes on..

August! Finally I made my decision to let go. If you ask me to prioritize between a guy and my friends, I'll have to say my friends are more important to me. When Friends fight, they get back tgt without that much of awkwardness. But when ur boyfriend fights with u, ends up breaking apart and awkwardness forever. Except some who would be a really good friend to you afterwards. (Seldom happens) I even left a dance troupe that I was originally in. It took be months to build up the courage to make the move and leave. Because I have the rights for my own happiness so I have to be the one stepping up for myself. Even though the outcome was going to be a harsh and emotional one, I just had to do so. One loss one gain. Can't have the best of both worlds. so if something that you are forcing youself to do and not feeling happy, step up for yourself. It would be the best decision you would have had in future. I made my decision cause I know God and family are most important to me. I know God would guide me through those storms after I made my decision. But up till today, my happiness and freedom I had now is all thanks to the step I took back then. I'm happy I made my decision.  August was also the month I love. Why? Cause SPORTS DAY! A day I wouldn't forget! I love the class's spirit on that day :') so much bonding so much fun! 

   

    We won first class for lower sec! :D thanks to 3 of our classmates who managed to came back in top 10 runners! 

 

  

   That bright orange class 

September! It was a month that is so near to my End Of Year Exams that I told myself I had to do better than before. So I worked harder and have myself a goal. Which was to IMPROVE myself. Not in the positions, but in the overall percentage. Step by step, do better than what I've done previously. I was satisfied with my result and was so happy though I know I could do better (: I also accepted Christ into my life on 17/9/13! 

 

     There definitely was an improvement! 

October! October was more of like a relax month. Haha! I attended some performance and then got lost in the midst of finding the performance place. Haha! I also attended at camp from 23-25 and another camp from 28-30. Not forgetting prefects camp on the 18-19! Prefects camp this year was more like an amazing race! we ran all over punggol and kovan area! So much fun with group 5 that I was in! :D 

  *we will we will rock you rock you, we are 5, we do fight, fight with who? Fight with you!* 

   And on the 23rd to 25th, it was sec 2 camp! I hate how they made us bond and then seperate us into different class next year :(( during this sec 2 camp, I was able to bond better with my Classmates, enjoy the time tgt and Tanjong Piai, experience many activities that has connection with MUD! (So much fun actually), able to step up and lead the class and many more! Except the fact that I kept thinking of going home cause of insects :x I'll miss 2E1 as a class! :( 2 years tgt! Loving our moments Tgt during sports day and during performance night at Sec 2 camp! :* <3 Lots of love from me! 

    I made it as the first girl to the top! 

    

   

    My nose bled halfway :x

  

  After the camp when we reached back sch, my class sang me a birthday song as it was on my birthday! 2 years straight and I'm having my birthday with my classmates! 

 

   Look what they did -_- 

    The next camp I attended was camp UNIC! It was a camp Tgt with other school people and came Tgt and learn more about service learning. Day 1 was rather boring cause full of workshops. Day 2 was at sentosa! Amazing race~ 

    Silver surfer! 

    

    Not forgetting Yuying's team who attended this camp! 

    

   

   

    With the teachers of the camp! 

 

Tiring but enjoyable October! Favourite month! ^_^ 

November! I started out having an overseas trip to Vietnam with my school as part of the NE ambassador. It was fun with them for the 5 days there and I definitely got closer to some of the people who I once just know them as hi-bye friends. I'm glad I got closer and they are so important to me now! 

  

   

    I miss this tour leader, BAM! 

 

   

   

   We came to this school as an exchange and I swear, I've never felt as popular before! Maybe cause I was able to speak Vietnamese and was able to communicate with them. It was fun though! 

  December! I had another camp in December which was church's Youth camp! I love 2nd day the most! We again, went to sentosa for amazing race but I got to leave halfway for dance class. 

 

    

   Dan tribe! * dan WHUT? DAN TRIBE! I can't hear you, dan WHUT?! DAN TRIBE!! Not loud enough, Dan WHUT?! DAN TRIBE! 

1,2,3 go! 

Hey, it's quiet in here, we need some noise in the atmosphere I say Hey! It's quiet in here, we need some noise in the atmosphere! Woo ah ah ah, woo ah ah ah, woo ah ah ah, dan tribe we go Woo woo! Woo ah ah ah woo ah ah ah woo ah ah , DAN TRIBE! * 

   I'm still amazed by Holy Spirit night on how God touched many people. Whether are they Christians or non-Christians. God is AMAZING~ I'm his child, He's my God! Jesus be the centre of it all! 

 Also in December as many of you have seen my photoshoot post, I went back to Vietnam for a visit with my family and friends! Went back to visit SIS and was surprised by how my kindergarten teacher recognized me! 

    Clearer photo at my Instagram! 

  I became even closer to my friends and I really love spending time with them! People who I'm hoping would be with me till the end! :* 

   

    Jane; crystal; Me; Xinyi. Important people of my life! 

   

    (phoebe; Ivy; Anna; Me) IMPORTANT PEOPLE! Stupid Ivy left :( 

   

   I spent countdown with them (Xinyi;Jackyline; Leslie; Jane)  and it was an  amazing night! Seeing the fireworks tgt, clubbing after that Tgt, and finding our way back later! ^_^ the best first few hours of 2014!! :D video on my Instagram! 

  

    Christmas this year with them !

  (Adrain; Xinyi; JianYee; Jane; Desmund; Delwin; Weitheen) 

   THANKS EVERYONE FOR 2013! :') 我爱你们, SARANGHAE!!